I Didn't Know

I didn't know that you should not switch on the lights when there's a gas leak.... I learnt it only when I heard of a terrible tragedy which happened to a family when one of them switched on the lights in their house during a gas leak.

There are millions of childless couples in the world spending money on fertility treatments and praying for a blessing. And then there are millions of women who pop morning-after pills or get their unwanted baby aborted.

Strange are the ways of God.

Who Is Rich?

Ben Zoma said: Who is rich? Those who are happy with their portion.

A joyful heart makes a cheerful face; A sad heart makes a despondent mood. All the days of a poor person are wretched, but contentment is a feast without end.

Who seeks more than he needs, hinders himself from enjoying what he has. Seek what you need and give up what you need not. For in giving up what you don’t need, you’ll learn what you really do need.

Five Past Midnight in Bhopal

I recommend the book 'Five Past Midnight in Bhopal' for anyone who hasn't read it. It's a chilling account of the Bhopal Gas Tragedy written by Dominique Lapierre. The book will move you. You may start hating American multi nationals after reading it... The tragedy occurred 25 years ago and even today people living in that area are suffering.. Here is a news report of one such victim who lost her vision on that fateful night..

A Must Visit Place Before You Die

I think each of us must definitely visit Dwarka and Somnath at least once in our lifetime. It's well worth the money, effort and time.

Last week my mother, brother and I went there. We went first to Somnath by train. The place is famous for it's Shiva temple which is one of the 12 Jyotirlings. The evening aarti and the 'sound and light show' following it were both spectacular. Somnath's (Veraval) also famous for the place where lord Krishna was hit by an hunter's arrow towards the end of Dwapar Yug (Mahabharat)...

From Somnath we went to Dwarka by bus which is about 250 kms away. We were there at the main temple for Aarti at 7.30 p.m. Krishna is beautiful, splendid, attractive, enchanting to say the least. You can look at the beautiful idol till the security person pulls you away to make way for the devotees behind you. There are other places to see like Rukmini temple which is about 2 km from the Dwarkadhish temple. Beyt dwarka (where Bhkata Sudama gave a bhet or gift to Krishna), Gopi Talab (where the gopis played with Krishna) and Nageshwar (a Jyothirling) are some places which are within 30 km from the main temple.... The gomti river is beautiful. It joins the Arabian Sea at Dwarka. Must bathe there.....

Will write a detailed travelogue later..Although there are many useful ones already on the Net.

Hi Again Bangalore

I will be saying goodbye to Mumbai afterall.. Just as I was getting used to the city's climate and culture my husband got a transfer to their Bangalore office.. I am happy to move mainly because I will be closer to my mother's house.

I am still undecided about looking for a job.. I want to start my job again but I am thinking if I can balance both home and work.... Hubby thinks if both of us work outside neither of us can get a good meal to eat :-)

Dukhasya anantaram Sukham. Sukhasya anantaram dukham.
Happiness follows sorrow. Sorrow follows happiness. It's like a cycle. So it's in sukha that we must worry more. Because dukha will not be far behind !!!

Annadaata Sukhibhava!

My grandmother used to say this at the end of her meal out loud. I am thankful to her for that otherwise I wouldn't have heard it at all. The last thing at night before sleeping she would call out to the Lord as, 'Kasi Kalabhairava, Panduranga, Deenabandhu, Bhaktavatsala....'

My mother also says 'Annadaata Sukhibhava' at the end of each meal although to herself. I rarely remember to say these words myself. I usually can't wait to finish my lunch to sit in front of my PC so whither the time to be thankful for the meal??

Disgusting Papers

Disgusting- that's the newspapers today are..Especially TOI Mumbai.. It's full of women's inner wear advertisements, movie people in minimal clothing and almost semi porn. The articles aren't that great either. There's bad news printed in big letters and little positive things. Why do I still buy this paper?? We did buy HT earlier and for some reason switched to TOI again. I can't remember - was HT better??

More And More

'There is enough in this world for everyone’s need but not enough for everyone’s greed'
Gandhiji said this.
Like I always say I hate this new age mantra- do more, work more, earn more, spend more, invest more, eat more, drink more, talk more, enjoy more, more and more......till you are no more.
This is nothing but greed.

'Punardarshanam Prapthirasthu'

Blessed are they that have had the darshan of Vithoba and Rakhumai of Pandarpur. They are both splendid! You can't take your eyes off them. Only till pushed away does the pilgrim move. Such is the rivetting beauty of the Lord and His Wife. The heart can only pray for another opportunity to visit the holy place.

Choice Is A Myth

In the film Kandukondein Kandukondein, the character of Soumya played by Tabu says, I haven't chosen my birth, my parents, my feminism, my name etc.. so why must I choose my husband myself.
I found that line interesting. It's true we don't choose anything. I think choice is a myth. We have little control over what we are born with and also what we will acquire, what we will experience and what we will 'get' in general. Yet we expect and set ourselves up for disappointment.
A distant relative was thoroughly disappointed at the birth of a grandDAUGHTER and not a grandson which she expected. Something so completely out of her control. Yet there is a preference. Sometimes, does God listen to our preferences?
He only gives/does what He likes. At most He will make us want what is in our future and give us the satisfaction that we have got what we wanted.

'You Will Get Used To It'

A colleague from my previous workplace once told, 'You know when God laughs. When we are making plans for our future'. That's true, I thought. We make plans for several years ahead when we don't know what will happen the next minute. He alone knows what's in store for us.
Funny thing is that although we make plans, lay down conditions, likes, dislikes, preferences and all, when we get something else we make do with that only. How we accept eventually what comes our way and get used to that. We can't control yet we expect.

Astrologer to client: The next 3 months are going to be very bad for you.
Client: After that time.
Astrologer: Welll, you'll get used to it.

We just get used to it.

Saved From Being Stranded

On the morning of Oct 1st 2009 my family members and I started on a journey towards Mantralaya from Dharwad in a car. It had been raining continuously for 3 days but we had no idea that the places of Raichur and Bellary have been flooded and least of all in Mantralaya.
We reached Gadag and saw the roads were blocked by 'halla' that was flowing with water. We took another route towards Gangavati and that was blocked by 2 feet water flowing across it. It was afternoon by then and the sky was overcast with gray clouds so we decided to return home thinking Rayaru doesn't want to give us darshan at this time. Let's go some other time.
After reaching home we saw the news channels were full of the terrible flood pictures about Mantralaya and nearby places. We were shocked to know that Swamiji was airlifted from Mantralaya to a safe place. Other pilgrims were stranded without food and water on the 3rd floor. If we had traveled just one day before we would have passed these roads and got stranded somewhere.
We can only thank Rayaru for giving us the good mind to return home and save us from being caught in such a bad situation.

Missed You, Missing You, Will Always Miss You

Sometimes it feels surreal that I have been living without my father for seven long years. Not a day has passed when I haven't thought of him. On some days more so than others.
My father was a man of very good understanding, quick wit and warmth. He was creative, passionate, thoughtful and loving. He didn't care much for discipline but compensated for it by great enthusiasm. He was knowledgable in a lot of subjects like Politics, Religion, Philosophy, Cinema, Music, Current Affairs, Trivia etc. Towards his later days he spent more time learning Madhwa shastra through his huge books collection. He was always a voracious reader. He was always ready to learn new things and to teach what he knew. He would be at equal ease with children as also with grown ups. He was friendly and had a charming smile.

When I was a child my father was my hero. I hung on to his every word. As a teenager, I used to dismiss the advice he often gave me, like most people of that age do. Later in life when I needed his advice the most he wasn't there to give it. I sometimes close my eyes and strain to recall what he had said on certain occasions. Did he have any unfulfilled wishes? Is there anything I can do to fulfill them now? There are many thoughts I want to share with him, get his opinion, share a joke and laugh together with him.

Now whenever I see a thin, handsome, oldish man of above average height wearing spectacles, checked shirt and white dhoti I can't help but remember him.

Thought For The Day

"When I'm not doing something that comes deeply from me, I get bored. When I get bored I get distracted and when I get distracted, I become depressed. It's a natural resistance, and it insures your integrity."

Maria Irene Fornes

Don't Worry, Be Happy

Confession: I used to read self help books few years ago. Not the Dale Carnegie ones but Anthony Robbins, Deepak Chopra and Stephen Covey etc. I used to be very motivated soon after reading their books but that motivation didn't last long. Later I started learning about our ancient Indian texts like Mahabharat, Bhagavat etc. through discourses and I was struck by the profoundness of the wealth of knowledge of our land. Then on, these self-help motivational paperbacks appeared rather shallow and quick fix to me. I was very happy to find this article on the Internet that points out what's wrong with this genre of books that have been on the bestselling lists worldwide.

Gist of BG

I came across a very good gist of the Bhagvad Gita on the Internet. The following appears on the back cover of a book by Dr. S. G. Mudgal. It so aptly summarises the message of Gita.

The world, according to the BG is real and not illusory, nor an illusion. The jivas are real. Bondage and attainment of Moksa are also real. Jnana and Bhakti are inclusive; ultimately it is Bhakti which leads to Mukti. Grace of Guru and God are emphasized. Bhakti continues even in the state of Moksa.

The Gita does not advocate the doctrine of Karma Sanyasa; but advocates the performance of Karma as worship, as dedication and an offering to God. Work thus done with a sense of dedication or worship, is liberating and not binding.

Weekend Break From Mumbai

I have been doing some vacation research. Some place near Mumbai for a weekend break. I am looking for some quiet time with nature and it seems Matheran is perfect. I don't know if the place is as good is it's on the travel brochure but I like the idea of 'no motor vehicles allowed' in this place. Yes, it seems that no motor vehicles are allowed in the tiny hill station of Matheran which is near Karjat on the Mumbai Pune highway. That's peach and quiet! I can also fulfill my dream of riding a toy train too. I don't have to go all the way to Darjeeling or Simla.

Doctor

One of the things that annoys me is how some people are so in awe of 'doctors'. What is it with such people? I like to think that medicine is a profession like any other. Sure it's well paid and prestigious but sometimes too much importance is attached to it. There are people who think they are failures if they don't become a doctor and they carry this regret for the rest of their lives. I have seen this kind of obsession where those who have been unsuccessful in becoming a doctor have to push their child to become one. If both are unsuccessful at least find in laws who are doctors. Surely this 'doctor' obsession is not only in India but also in U.S. as I noticed in the 'Friends' sitcom.

The Media Loves Illnesses

The media loves illnesses. Especially the swine flu. Otherwise why would they show constantly the number of people down with this flu, number dead and predict how many would be affected by it. It looks to me like an election result in progress. It does little but create panic among people. I developed a sore throat few days ago and I think if I should get myself tested.

I received an email today that read that there's no need to panic by the H1N1 virus. Here is the details of the email.

These are few facts about swine flu when discussed with the leading epidemiologists.

1) Swine flu, that is H1N1 flu is not new, first detected in 1987

2) Infective stage of flue is 5 days, 1 day before and 4 days after onset of symptoms

3) The best way to prevent it spreading is asking patient having symptoms of flu like fever cough and running nose to take rest at home for 4 days so he does not transmit it

4) Masks are of limited value if any, in this disease, it can spread through droplets on your skin, through contact etc, and I have seen that the masks in Pune are worn as fashion statement, while walking on road today morning I saw people wearing masks coming out for a morning walk with their dogs!, many wearing masks around their necks, and so on, infact these masks shall act as the vehicles to carry the virus, instead, avoiding crowded places or cinema halls or malls where airconditioners are on, is advisable, because you get recirculated air, where the virus density multiplies

5) Death after H1N1 flu is not common, infact infections like measles is taking toll of thousands more every year, and we are oblivious of the facts. Swine flu is being blown out of proportion by media trying to create hysteria among lay people.

6) Fever accompanied by respiratory distress, should be immediately notified which is likely to be a complication of H1N1 flu

7) The mortality is less than .01 percent of those affected, that means may be one in 10,000 affected is likely to suffer the life loss.

8) If you remember, 2 years ago SARS was blown out of proportion, what happened? Humans develop immunity to the virus, the same is going to happen, we develop immunity in due course of time, the virus is in the air, you can not stop it, our body is already developing the immunity so nothing to panic.

We need to take care of children and elderly who have less immunity and do not let them go to crowded places that is all .

Thought For The Day

"As a scientist, I am not sure anymore that life can be reduced to a class struggle, to dialectical materialism, or any set of formulas. Life is spontaneous and it is unpredictable, it is magical. I think that we have struggled so hard with the tangible that we have forgotten the intangible."

Diane Frolov and Andrew Schneider

Thought For The Day

"Passion is the quickest to develop, and the quickest to fade. Intimacy develops more slowly, and commitment more gradually still."
Robert Sternberg

Bad TV

It's sad what some people will do for money. They will come on national TV and confess to their dirty little secrets. There's the new reality show where people are asked very personal questions are asked about themselves and a lie detector verifies their answers. What channels won't do to get higher TRPs. Saas bahu serials are out. Reality shows where women are shown bathing in the falls, old men confess their dirty sexual acts are in.

I detest television now more than I ever did. The long commercial breaks during movies really get on my nerves. You can actually watch 2-3 movies at a time if you switch channels swiftly and spend 5 hours. Except for sitcoms like Everybody Loves Raymond and Friends and the 'Little Krishna' cartoon show on Nick and few good programmes on NatGeo and Discovery I hate to watch anything else.

I hate how much TV has become a part of all our lives. As I climb up to my third floor flat sometimes I peek into some of the houses. Predictably the TV is on in all homes. In the tiny flats there's no other way of spending time. There isn't even a balcony where we can go for fresh air. The thing about Mumbai is that it's either too hot or it's rainy to go out anywhere. God, what would I have done if there wasn't the Internet!

Thought For The Day

"The really potent part of love is that it allows you to carry around beliefs about yourself that make you feel special, desirable, precious, innately good. Your lover couldn't have seen [these qualities] in you, even temporarily, if they weren't part of your essential being."

Martha Beck

Prices Sky High

The rising prices of food items is worrying me. Toor dal costs Rs. 80 a kilo!! It used to be around Rs.50 last year this time.
Hope the rains gods are kind on us and we get plenty of rains this year.

Apparently, I am a Retrohousewife!!!

They say now it's the return of the housewives. First there were women who married early, had kids and when the kids were older went to work outside. Then came the supermoms who are trying to balance work and home. Now it's time for retrohousewives. That's right. These are women who have education and a career which they give up after having kids later in life. They postpone marriage and kids for the sake of career and then they give up their career to be with their families. Now you may call that having the cake and eating it too.

It's been a year since I have been without a job. Surprisingly I am enjoying the free time. Now I am thinking maybe I shouldn't go back to full time employment in the IT industry. It's hard to manage both home and work. It's cool to stay at home. There are so many things to do, so much to learn. I believe that for some of us girls who take up professional course and join the workforce we begin to think and act like guys. Some even dress like guys. I think sometimes we don't explore our feminine side. I mean earlier women who stayed at home were adept at cooking different items, making jams and pickles at home, making embroidery and knitting sweaters, making beautiful mehendi, rangoli and the rest. Women with jobs may have these skills but no time to enjoy them.
So I think I am going to learn some skills that I haven't in all these years.

Monsoon Is Here

Finally monsoon has arrived in the city of Mumbai last week. Rains are lashing the city. We pray that it doesn't rain so much as to flood the city.

About PPF Account

I opened a PPF account 2 years ago at a Post Office. I made payments in it for 2 years for tax saving purpose under Section 80 G. This year I didn't pay into my PPF account as I didn't have any taxable income. But I did go to check my account balance and was surprised to know I have to pay a penalty of Fifty rupees for defaulting on my payment this year. Turns out every year we have to make a minimum deposit of Five Hundred Rupees into our account else will be charged. Okay, why do I always have to learn things the hard way?

Joke Of The Day

Q: Why was the lawyer reading the Bible right before he died?

A: He was looking for loopholes!

On Turning 30

I will join the 30's club tomorrow. I will no longer in my 'late twenties' but 'early thirties'. I am not too fond of growing old.

Anyway I just realised that I spent most part of my 30 years wishing for what I didn't have and in the process made myself and the people around me unhappy.

So I resolve to spend the rest of my life being happy with what I have. So, God help me!

I wrote in one of my earlier posts if more choices lead to confusion. Choices without guidance confuses. Ah!

Thought For The Day

Who seeks more than he needs, hinders himself from enjoying what he has.

What Would You Do?

In one of the many job interviews that I have attended I was asked a very memorable question. Everything else being perfect i.e. if it wasn't for money what would you do ? At that time I think I said I would watch T.V. ( I am wondering why I said that). If I was asked that question now I think I would say by going on a pilgrimage and listening to 'harikatha'. If money wasn't an objective I would spend my time in community service. I am doing very little volunteering these days. I would do more of that.

If you had all the money what would you do?

Jai Gurudev?

This is my grouse against AOL- Art of Living. Like one prominent personality of the country said, Sri Ravi Shankar is a guru of the rich. Not surprising for the fees they charge. Not only that, they don't send the membership cards that they say they will. I attended the AOL course in 2003 at their center in Anna nagar, Chennai. The instructor I think Mr.Krishnan collected Rs.20 from each of the participants alongwith an envelope and a passport sized photograph and said that our AOL membership cards will be despatched to our addresses. That didn't happen. We are told during the course that once we do the course we can/should attend the long kriya sessions. Recently, my husband went to the AOL center here at Borivali west, Mumbai on a sunday to attend the long kriya session. He was told to do the beginners course again and then come here. My husband explained that he has done the beginners course earlier in Bangalore and that he is familiar with the Sudarshan kriya but still he wasn't allowed and sent back. I think this is not fair. AOL is making money out of stressed people and for some of us it has caused more stress. Jai Gurudev??!

Hard Work Never Killed Anyone But Why Take A Chance??

When I was studying in school, I remember once I was complaining to my friends about getting marks lower than I expected. At that my friend said that I always expect a lot without putting efforts to match. I ignored that comment back then. Now about 15 years later I realise that I still have the same attitude. Hard work has never been my forte.

I had this negative attitude that what's the use of putting in more efforts than necessary. What if the efforts go waste. I need to be convinced that something is worth doing then I would do it well. I guess I lacked motivation. I am not very good at motivating myself. I need someone to tell me that I am doing the right thing and encourage me.

I miss having a mentor, guide or someone like that.

Sometimes I feel like most people would, that I haven't fully utilised my potential. I read an article last week that many people feel this way. They feel that there weren't enough opportunities for them to prove their worth and that they haven't achieved what they had set out to. Then there are those who have 'achieved' the maximum in their careers but at the cost of their personal and family lives.. Hmm.. It's true. Too much analysis is paralysis.

Daily Dose Of Depression

They say when America sneezes teh world cathces cold. An article in today's paper TOI- A Russian has predicted that US will collapse within a year into 6 different states. He cites the schools shootings, large number of prison inmates and increasing gay population to point to the great psychological stress in the country. He also thinks that Russia and China will be the new superpowers and their currency will replace the American dollar.

There's an old film song 'Seene mein jalan, ankhon mein toofan sa kyun hai? Is sheher mein har shaks pareshansa kyun hain?' I can't help but wonder how the song catches every city dweller's mood. There's hardly a smiling, relaxed face to see. There's angry, impatient, sad, bored, worried, anxious, bad, evil, envious, greedy, looking for their next victim kind of people around us.

A sure way to get depressed is to read the newspaper. There's so much bad news in it that it's sure to ruin your day if you read it first thing in the morning. There's news of looting, cheating, killing, poaching and so many negative things happening. People losing their feet in train accidents, losing their lives over petty quarrels and of course women under stress. Why does this happen? Isn't it karma? The worst part is any of these horrible things could happen to anyone of us. It's God's mercy that keeps us safe and in good health and cheer.

My Brother Calls Me A 'Moral Police'

Another topic that bothers me is that more people (women) consume alcohol these days. There are forums for pub going, forward women and the members are proud of it. Why???? What's wrong with being sober? What impression will those who drink leave on their children? I am sure a family that drinks together cannot stay together.

I read last month in the papers that in England the Government has decided to do away with the 'happy hours' in the pubs because more teenagers are turning alcoholics and this is affecting the nation. I am surprised that it has taken the Government of that country so long to realise this! We here always knew that alcohol is bad whether it's 'social' or 'habitual'. Drinking is bad not only for the individual but also the family, society and the country.

Whither Our Society?

The newspaper these days carries very disturbing news. The latest is the kidnapping of a youth by his 'friends' for a ransom. What's going on?

I blame it on the changing value system of our country. The days are gone when we were taught that good character is above all else. Every child was expected to grow up to be a 'good' citizen. Moral science was taught and practised by all. Now I wonder if 'sex education' has replaced 'moral science' in schools. There are 'Personality development courses' and no 'Character development'. 'Smart' has replaced 'good'. Honesty and hardwork are not fashionable. Rich and successful are in even if they are earned by 'other' means. Ends have justified means.
The only moral today is for every child to score more marks and for every grown up make more money. I have noticed how most conversations among ourselves concern only 2 topics- how to make money and how to save money.

What Now?

It's 8 months since I left my job and have been at home since then. It's been quite a long gap. I had hoped that I would find a job in Mumbai but that hasn't happened yet. Bangalore has been very kind to me. It gave me two jobs and also my engineering admission. I hate it when people complain about BLR. It has given jobs to millions and made several millionaires.

Anyway my problem is that I need a job now. I am bored and have nothing to do after cooking and eating. I am going to an NGO once a week to help them with documentation but that's not enough.

The IT job market is bad enough and I am having second thoughts about going back to the IT industry where I worked for 3 years. I wonder if the long hours and long commute are worth it? It leaves little time for anything else. But I am not trained for any other job. I can test software and I am good at it.
I am waiting and hoping for the best.

Photographer And The Purohit

Weddings are socio-religious occasions. The religious part is important. But I don't see that being taken seriously these days. I don't like weddings where the photographer is more important than the purohit. The rituals of marriage ceremony must take place and most importantly the bride and the groom must be understand the significance and sit through the rituals patiently.
Just like we invite friends and relatives for the occasion we must also invite the Gods and Gddesses to the occasion and invoke their blessings for the newly weds.

Sign Of The Times

In my earlier post I wrote that nowadays women are not wearing bindis so much. I also notice now that plaits/braids is not in vogue either. I hardly see plaited hair on any of the women. Let me add that I plait my hair these days. My hair's very managable that way. It doesn't tangle.
Long hair was considered beautiful until sometime ago. Nowadays every young girl looks just the same. Shoulder length hair left open wears jeans and a t-shirt. No bindi or bangles of course!

See Thru Fashion

What's with the see thru sarees? Why bother to wear them? May as well wear only the blouse. I don't like where fashion is going.

My blog got published!

Yesterday my article got published in the Hindustan Times Mumbai edition! I had sent one of my blog posts 2 months ago for a column that features reader's experiences. My article was edited so I did find some new things there. But I sure was excited to see 'Sreedevi Damodar' on the page!